watched it in the living room with Hayley, Neal, and Riana . . . never get to finish it. Right after Britney Murphey kills herself, that's when the TV always gets shutoff..too drunk, too tired, too much noise, the list could go on forever ...reasons why I can never get to the end of it.
Maybe we'll finish it tomorrow.
What is being normal? How do you really know that you're better, just because you get released? All the drugs they gave....my memories are so skewed yet strong..I don't remember what I looked like..just what I looked at and felt.... tons of left over bruises and fucked up ribs from what got me in there in the first place. If anything, I think I might have gotten worse after my release. Institutions can either be exactly what you need, or a roundtrip hell ride through Perpetual Bad Dreamland, where you get so out of your head that you start drawing pictures of butterfly needles and scratch your jumbled drugged diary in between the lines of the only book you were given to read....that would eventually be taken away from you.
A stay away in a place like that ... you don't ever get that out of your head...you'd be crazy if you could.
But it lessens as life goes on. Sometimes I almost forget. But there's some weird, and very strong part of me that really doesn't want to forget. At all. What does that mean?
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